Gibbs-ilocks and the Three Ex-Wives

The Season 3 premiere and finale, "Kill Ari" and "Hiatus" respectively, have raised big questions about the continuity of the Leroy Jethro Gibbs storyline. The following is my distillation of the arguments for and against, pulled mostly from the discussion at the "Friends of NCIS" board (particularly ceindreadh and DC).

In Season 3, we discover that Gibbs' first wife Shannon and his daughter Kelly were killed being transported with a NIS agent after Shannon witnessed a Mexican drug dealer murder somebody. Gibbs hunted down their killer personally and killed them. Ziva David discovered this and told Ari Haswari in her dossier on Gibbs, and Ari used Gibbs' overprotectiveness of the women in his life by killing Kate and trying to kill Abby.

Fans immediately pointed out that Gibbs had been married and divorced three times. Here is what has been said in Seasons 1-2.

Season 1-2 canon stated that Gibbs was married only three times and he was divorced three times. He oddly owes all three alimonies (an unusual circumstance, particularly since one has enough money to live in the Jefferson Hotel), making him poorer than he ought to be, a constant joke with the (wisely) still single Tony. The latter two were violent, and one of them most likely cheated on him. His three marriages and his three divorces are common knowledge to both Ducky and to Tony (and Kate finds out during her time there), and he does not ever contradict what they say although he does try to return to the topic (the case) at hand.
 

Being, of course, fans - the only ones who would notice such discrepancies, glaring though they were - a few different theories appeared (aside from alien jokes and so on).

• MARRIED THREE TIMES, DIVORCED TWICE.
  In a brave attempt to keep with Gibbs' own statements - he has been married three times, not four ["Marine Down"] and "I've had three wives, DiNozzo" ["Lt. Jane Doe"] (not counting the fact that every single person but McGee has referenced Gibbs' being MARRIED three times) - some fans postulate he has been married three times only; Shannon died, he married two more times, and has two ex-wives.

  PROBLEM: Gibbs himself says he has three ex-wives ["The Truth Is Out There", "The Bone Yard"]. He later says that a redheaded reporter reminds him of his ex-wives - "all of 'em", indicating more than two (which would be "both") ["Missing"]

• MARRIED FOUR TIMES, DIVORCED THREE:
  A much better option, although it does make Gibbs look a bit of a cad. The theory tptb use in "Hiatus": Ducky has met all three of his ex-wives, and since Shannon died, there is a total of four.

  PROBLEM:
  (1) Gibbs himself says twice that he was married three times (see above) during Seasons 1-2.

  (2) In Season 3, in "Untouchable", he says he has had three roommates, called "ex-wives". Shannon would have made the number of roommates four. (Thanks to the NCIS Special Ops Continuity Errors thread)

  To explain this, fans have theorized

  • that he lies continuously to his team because he does not want people to know about Shannon.
    This requires one (1) to reconcile lying with Gibbs' usual behavior in response to those who pry too much, which is simply not to respond or to smack the person. He also made a particular effort to disabuse Kate of the notion when she claimed he'd been married four times, despite the fact that Kate and Tony were actually arguing Gibbs' lack of perfection in general, not his marriages. In addition, this would be difficult since his marriages and his divorces are all in his file and in his LESes.

    or (2) pretend that his only beloved wife and his daughter never existed.

    He also offered an unflattering pronouncement on wife #1 when he said his first two marriages were based on appearances ["Conspiracy Theory"].

  • that he has been so traumatized he does not remember it (traumatic amnesia).
    A form of post-traumatic stress disorder is possible, and people have been known to shut out memories of things as if they truly do not exist. Gibbs, however, is not one of them. He has no problem remembering them in "Kill Ari, Part II", he holds up a flask with their names on it and drinks to them, and he remembers his daughter in "Honor Code".

Seasons 1-2 on Gibbs' Wives

• Season 1
  • Tony asks Ducky about Gibbs' strange behavior early October. Ducky says that it's Gibbs' anniversary--Tony asks, "Which marriage?" Ducky replies, "The last one." He then continues on to say, "Every year, ex-wife number three...." ["Hung Out to Dry"]

  • In 1999, Gibbs' third wife hit him on the head with a baseball bat, and he turned to Ducky for help. ["The Curse"]

  • Kate has tricked Tony into speaking with Paula Cassidy to make up. When Gibbs asks why women must fix "what doesn't need fixing", Kate only chuckles and says it makes women feel warm inside. Gibbs replies, "So does Scotch, but it doesn't cost you a house" - perhaps he lost one in a divorce. ["Minimum Security"]

  • Tony and Kate argue about whether or not Gibbs can be wrong, and Kate's evidence is: "The man's been married, like, four times." She says this without realizing that Gibbs has just come in and overheard her. The three of them discuss the case at hand. Kate is going to do something when, at the end of the scene, Gibbs corrects her: "Kate. It was three times. Not four."

    Firstly, Kate is not making a definitive comment about Gibbs' marriages. Her definitive argument is that Gibbs is not perfect, and her evidence is the fact he has been married multiple times. She pulls a number from her memory - "like, four times" - it is not definitive. Tony also takes this not as a definitive statement on Gibbs' marriages - although he knows Gibbs has been married only three times, he makes no effort to correct Kate. He lets it go, because he knows that she is not arguing about Gibbs' marriages. Gibbs, however, finds a need to correct her.

    Later, Kate asks about the relevance of the Leave and Earnings Statements for their missing Marines, and Gibbs replies that the government records everything: "...days at sea, when they receive hazardous duty and combat pay." He pauses, giving her a look, and then adds, "Divorces." (None of the two Marines were divorced.) Kate looks appropriately sheepish.

    The bad guy says he cannot believe Gibbs trusted him, and Gibbs replies that the bad guy sounds just like [Gibbs'] ex-wife (using the singular). ["Marine Down"]

  • Gibbs knows the number to the Jefferson Hotel by heart. When Tony asks how, Gibbs replies, "My ex-wife lives there." ["Left for Dead"]

  • Gibbs' second wife played golf left-handed. Tony tells Kate in front of Gibbs that wife #2 tried to hit Gibbs in the head with a seven iron. (There is no reason to indicate she succeeded.) Kate later deduces that the reason Gibbs' second wife came after him with a nine-iron is because he refused to talk out his problems with her. Gibbs grins mischievously and tells her that's not true - it was a seven-iron. ["Eye Spy"]

  • Kate is puzzled by Gibbs' behavior concerning a redheaded suspect and talks about it with Tony. Tony declares, "He [Gibbs] has been married three times. All redheads." Kate is unimpressed by Gibbs' jdugment: "Three redheaded ex-wives says his judgment is a little questionable." Tony's only objection to her comment: "None of them were murder suspects." ["My Other Left Foot"]

  • Kate complains about Tony's fast driving on the way to a crime scene, and they fight. Gibbs replies that it brings back memories - of marriage.

    Gibbs makes a crack about a dingy warehouse looking like DiNozzo's apartment. DiNozzo replies that he has a maid now: "It's amazing what you can do when you don't have to pay three alimonies." Gibbs does not deny his comment; he shines his flashlight in Tony's eyes, which makes Tony change the subject. ["One Shot, One Kill"]

  • Tony speculates that Gibbs' carrying two cups of coffee is because of some kind of issue with one of his ex-wives. ["The Good Samaritan"]

  • Gibbs, Kate, and Tony discover Col. Will Ryan is building a boat. When Kate wonders if all Marines do this, Tony jokes that only Marines who have been married a few times build boats - the others can afford to buy them. ["Enigma"]

  • Tony is pleased that Gibbs thinks he is somebody Gibbs can trust and depend on; "[his] best man", a comment which just makes Gibbs laugh. Tony then says to Abby, "I don't think best man was the right thing to say to somebody who's been married thrice." ["Bête Noire"]

  • Gibbs tells Abby he has three ex-wives and thus cannot afford fetishes. ["The Truth is Out There"]

  • During an interrogation, Gibbs tells the suspect he came home from a three-month float in the Mediterranean to find his wife in a bedroom with another guy. It bothered him immensely, but he chose divorce over murder.

    When joking about Gibbs' boat, Gibbs says that Special Agent Williamson must be married because he is sailing a ketch - one cannot single-hand a ketch. Kate guesses that Gibbs is not building a ketch in his basement, with the assumption that he is not married; Gibbs "corrects" her by saying the basement is too small for a ketch. The defense lawyer is irritated by their joking. ["UnSEALed"]

  • Tony figures that Gibbs is not big on statistics. "I mean, since most marriages end in divorce and you've been married three...." He cuts off when Gibbs glares at him.

    Earlier, Gibbs is very hard on a redheaded reporter, and Kate comments on it. Gibbs actually does reply, saying that the reporter reminded him of his ex-wife. Tony, of course, wants to know which one, and Gibbs replies, "All of 'em." ["Missing"]

  • Gibbs' behavior in chasing Ari is beginning to worry Kate. She talks about it with Tony, who is unconcerned, and then to Ducky, who explains that he acted like this "just before his last divorce." Kate jokes that unfortunately she and Tony don't have that option of divorcing Gibbs, and Ducky replies that they wouldn't want to, no matter how grumpy Gibbs gets.

    Kate assumes that Gibbs' irascible behavior, both now and at the time of this last divorce, had to be because he was chasing a bad guy. Ducky confirms her guess when he explains that Gibbs' last divorce resulted when he became obsessed with chasing down a child murderer. ["Reveille"]

• Season 2
  • Tony comforts Abby, telling her that Gibbs is almost never wrong. "Discounting the whole marriage thing, of course." ["See No Evil"]

  • Gibbs and Kate are discussing the case and whether the missing sailor went to see a psychiatrist or not. Gibbs volunteers another option, using himself as the example. "Second divorce. Saw the padre." ["Good Wives Club"]

  • Gibbs is interrogating a suspect - more like making the suspect wet his pants. Tony and Kate are standing behind the mirror, watching, and Tony comments that Gibbs likes scaring people more than he likes sex. Either Kate replies, or Tony continues, "That would explain the three wives." ["Vanished"]

  • Kate has been on Tony's back mercilessly about not returning the extra change the cashier had given him. Tony doesn't believe that karma will come back and bite him. He asks Gibbs what he thinks, and Gibbs' answer is, "I've had three wives, DiNozzo." ["Lt. Jane Doe"]

  • Gibbs is mad at a Marine CID gunnery sergeant who keeps messing up his crime scene. As he stomps off, Kate jokes that she thought only Tony could make him that mad. Tony replies that Kate never met Gibbs' second wife. There is no indication of whether or not Tony has met her. (In a cut scene, Kate asks if Tony has met her before, and Tony replies that he has not. It does not seem, however, that Tony had to have met Wife #2 - he could have seen an exchange Gibbs had with her over the phone or the like.)

    When talking with the mobster who threatens to kill all of Gibbs' male relatives, Gibbs glibbly informs him that he has no brothers, no uncles, and his father died a long time ago. "I do have three ex-wives whose name and addresses I will gladly fax on to you." ["The Bone Yard"]

  • Gibbs had a wife who either was not a good cook or never seemed to care what Gibbs wanted to eat. "You eat what you're served with a smile. It's like being married." ["Call of Silence"]

  • Ducky and Gibbs are discussing a dead body. Ducky is sure that Gibbs thinks murder is involved, and Gibbs smiles and says that Ducky knows him well - he suspects everything. Ducky is amused: "That's an admirable trait in an investigator. And also the reason your three marriages ended in divorce." Gibbs just laughs and jokes back, "All these years I thought it was because I was a bastard." Ducky replies with a smile that that didn't help.

    Ducky and Palmer later discuss Gibbs' wives. Ducky says he introduced him to the last wife, and she won't talk to Ducky any more. ["Black Water"]

  • Kate promises to stick to Ducky like glue - Gibbs, smiling, gives her a better analogy: "Like an ex-wife after an alimony check." ["Meat Puzzle"]

  • Gibbs, as he did with Kate in ["Good Wives Club"], again volunteers personal information. He tells McGee that the sofa is convertible: "Slept on one for seven months." Tony asks if it was after the third wife, and Gibbs gives him a look. ["Witness"]

  • Ducky and Abby know of a complex and highly expensive procedure they can use to lift fingerprints, but they need Gibbs' go ahead because it is so expensive and rarely works. Gibbs replies, "So's getting married. Do it." ["Pop Life"]

  • The apartment manager is hitting on Gibbs, and she finally asks Kate how Gibbs stayed single for so long. Kate replies that he didn't - he was married three times, which intrigues the woman a lot.

    Abby is telling Gibbs about the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, and Gibbs just keeps giving her blank looks. She finally concludes, "I'm beginning to understand why you were married three times."

    Gibbs speaks with a former commanding officer, and they mention Bircko, in Bosnia. The commanding officer says that he heard Gibbs got remarried again (meaning Gibbs was remarried at least once), and Gibbs says that it didn't work out, and the commanding officer jokes that some things don't change. ["Eye for an Eye"]

  • Tony admits that he has had so many short-lived relationships that he doesn't remember all of them. Gibbs replies with sympathetic levity, "I have the same problem with ex-wives." ["Bikini Wax"]

  • Gibbs comments, "Well, my first two marriages were based on appearances."

    McGee and Tony are commenting on Gibbs and Fornell in the interrogation room. Tony says they are bad cop and scary cop, and McGee wants to know which one is which. Tony replies, "I think you'll have to ask their ex-wives that one." (The problem with this one is, if Gibbs had only one ex-wife and Fornell had one ex-wife, they would still add up to plural wives, so this is no indication of how many ex-wives either had.) ["Conspiracy Theory"]

  • Gibbs tells Abby that the last thing he needs is another wife. ["SWAK"]

  • Fornell married Gibbs' second wife (Gibbs calls her his second wife), who cleaned out both Gibbs and Fornell and cleaned out their bank accounts when she left them. Gibbs had warned Fornell. ["Twilight"]